 Hi...The fourth Life Enrichment Skill is Gentleness. This is probably the one that many of us find hard to develop, especially in current society. It seems that gentleness comes with a sense of personal peace. And that is usually the hardest development we will ever make. Gentleness adds softness to a hectic and chaotic life. It is the ability to slow down, to move with grace and comfort, especially within oneself. It is the attitude of kindness that we often see in someone who has just been handed a new born baby. The act of picking up and holding a puppy is usually done with gentleness. Real beauty is also often seen with a gentle response. So, it seems that gentleness is connected to the good things in life--the goodness in the individual person with an attitude of respect for life and the multitude of persons. Gentleness comes with the ability to genuinely care, ( an act of kindness almost always has an air of gentleness to it) And the more we are treated with gentleness, the more we are likely to develop it. Gentleness is definitely worth the effort of making it part of one's personality and character. Go for it, but in a gentle way...  ********************************************************** Ok, The next Life Enrichment Skill is Appreciation. This is what allows us to to be moved by beauty or to become enthusiastic about another persons' competence, (ie. usually a sports figure, etc.).Other examples are our appreciation of Grandmas' apple pie, the best coffee we have ever tasted, or the bigger than normal tip we received. In many ways appreciation precedes gratitude. After all, it is hard to be grateful for something we don't appreciate. Appreciation opens the door to all the good things in life. Look at the above picture. It can be seen as just a picture of water or as a waterfall that gently flows in a peaceful way. It's obvious that to appreciate the details of a nature scene is to have more enjoyment. Often when someone really appreciates a particular thing, they become expert hobbyists in the field. For example, someones' appreciation of wine can lead to them becoming a wine connoisseur. It seems that without the ability to appreciate life we are left with a life of rote and boredom. So, can you slow down and take the time to develop the art and skill of appreciation? There is so much beauty out there... Wishing you a peaceful week. Jeanne  ******************************************************************* Life Enrichment Skills ---what really add quality to our lives. The second one in my series is a sense of Wonder. Do you remember when you were young and the whole day was filled with amazing surprises that sparked your curiosity more? A sense of wonder is the ability to say "Oh, Wow!" at life, to be actively aware of beauty, talent, goodness, etc. It fills us with positive energy and makes the world brighter. And it increases our ability to appreciate the gifts that we have been given. We can wonder at something or about something. For example, we can wonder at the presence of a newborn infant or wonder about how decorative cakes are made. But when we talk about a sense of wonder we usually mean to wonder at something wonderful. This is one of those skills that children have naturally, but as we grow up we seem to lose. One time I was with a client sitting by a stream when three Canada geese came down and did a simultaneous perfect landing on the water. My spontaneous response was, "Oh wow! did you see that?" But from her perspective, it was just another mundane situation. Lack of a sense of wonder can occur because of many things like depression, grief, self-absorption, loss, etc. But it can be renewed. Suggestions for renewing a sense of wonder: Spend more time in nature; be aware of sights and sounds; allow yourself to be silent; consider the importance of living in the now as much as possible since now is the only time we really have; begin to be aware and appreciate small experiences that have been taken for granted. Go in peace...  ********************************************* 6/29/19 Okay, I don't have anything material to pass out, but I have "something much more valuable"... Life Enrichment skills and gifts are the real things that help make us happier individuals. There is no cost, no price--they are free. However, we seem to have lost many of them along the way. We tend to have been sidetracked by society. What I would like to do is to increase awareness of what some of the Life Enrichment Skills are so you can practice (maybe again).There are approximately 15 to 20 of them. The next several blogs will be my meager thoughts--in the moment, on a variety of Life Enrichment skills that add genuine value to our lives. The first life enrichment skill is Gratitude. This is the ability, no matter what our situation is, to be grateful for what we have been given. Some of the happiest people in the world have very few material items. In reality, material goods are not necessary for happiness. Many of us have been given the wrong message that the more we have the more successful we are, and if we can only acquire more we will obtain peace of mind. With this wrong message can come a sense of entitlement, and a belief that others do not deserve what we should be entitled to. Gratitude helps us realize that all though all that we have may be more or less than what others have, we are gifted with numerous things to be grateful for. Gratitude can change our attitude and give us satisfaction and acceptance.It takes us off our podium and places us firmly on the ground with all of our other brothers and sisters. So, what are you grateful for? When was the last time you said "thank you" and sincerely meant it? Peace be with you... Jeanne  ************************** 6/22/19 Hi there... You may be aware that there are four basic ethical principles that we as human beings need to follow or at least hold true.They are the ethical principles that are taught in all healthcare professions. (Too bad they are not consistently taught in other professions such as business and politics.) I can't help but wonder what would happen if each of us chose our behavior with these in mind... First--Do no harm Make things better Respect others Be fair Be honest Ok, who's the smart one that noticed there are five listed? And there is even one more ethical principle that Jesus gives us: Be loving to all. When I wrote this last sentence I was so tempted to put it in the past tense, eg..Jesus gave us...But I think we tend to then use his teaching as just something in the past rather than today, and today is the only time we have to love others... Be at peace... Jeanne  ********************************************************* It’s one of those days that is almost summer but not quite. It’s even better. The sky is blue and the trees become a sparkle field when I look up through them. The temperature is between 60/70. This is my favorite kind of day—the type where the weather allows no reason for negative thinking. Here and now I feel good, positive, and kind. It is a day—like any other day really, where the environment does its’ best to help with happiness. It is interesting how once I am in a positive mood it leads to awareness of other positives. I am more aware and appreciative of the bluebird I saw on the fence yesterday or the catbird meowing outside my office window. I am glad to get a magazine in the mail. It will be added to my reading list tonight (one of my favorite parts of the day.) With my senses on alert for some of the good things in life I feel like I can be my best in whatever situation occurs. Relaxation causes this but mindfulness and meditation also can. They all have the ability to put me in the now-- the true reality. I wonder why I need things outside myself to be prompts for being my best. Couldn’t I just be reminded that learning to be my best, along with learning to love are the two main goals in life. Sounds easy but is very difficult. If only it could go on regularly, consistently, without over thinking. If only it would always be easy to feel positive. If only I would spend more time with the silence that is peace… ************************************************************  My new senior bucket list... Being of the age where I am bombarded with wisdom, I’ve discovered that I need to adjust my lifetime bucket list because my body is not being cooperative. So, the following are what I hope to do before I die. --Finish my racy novel and send it to Harlequin. --Watch the Cleveland Browns play in the Super Bowl. --Review my vacation pictures of the top of Mt. Everest. --Re-gift my husband. --Stay up once a week after 9:00 pm. --Get my scooter detailed. --Go on a zip line ride through virtual reality. --Finally earn the medical degree I have been seeking--one body part at a time. --Use my lifetime collection of fruit cakes for Christmas gifts. --Get rid of all Christmas wrapped boxes from 1960. --Definitely finish the wine left over from my sister’s wedding in 1954. --For the first time, treat my family to dinner on my good china. Wish me luck… **********************************************  The Present of Your Life Present is a rich word in two senses. It means gift and it means now. That describes your life too. It is a gift, and it is happening now. As you read these words, you are living your life. Your life isn’t something that’s going to happen once you’ve rehearsed the right lines or saved up enough money or found the right spouse or landed the perfect job or moved to the perfect place, etc. Your life is happening every moment and you can’t escape or postpone it. What you’re doing now is spending a small portion of your life reading this. You are using part of that gift that is your life. And you need to use that gift as well and as wisely as you know how with a sense of responsibility, truthfulness, wisdom,and compassion. The following truths or facts of life are starting points from which new growth and happiness can occur: ----- No one can bring your life to you ----- No matter what you do in life, someone important to you isn’t going to like it at times. ----- Though it’s painful, rejection won’t kill you--- and it may even lead to growth. ----- Every choice means giving up something else. ----- Some people are not capable of giving you what you want from them. ----- The way you treat yourself sets the standard for others. ----- Life is a continuous range of possibilities, not an on/off switch. ----- Some problems cannot be solved, but you can make peace with them. adapted from On a Clear Day You Can See Yourself by Dr. Sonya Friedman  ************************************************** 5/11/19 Many of us are aware of the Serenity Prayer, but most have only heard the first half of the prayer. I feel the second half is equally as useful so I want to share the the whole version with you: God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. Grant me patience with the changes that take time, an appreciation for all that I have, a tolerance of those with different struggles, and the strength to get up and try again one day at a time.  ************************************************ 5/3/19 Necessary “How To” skills you never learned in school… A while back I had written a blog on critical “how to” skills you never learned in school. By request, I have added some additional necessary skills that go with the challenges of adulthood. See if you agree… ---How to handle suffering in your life ---How to keep perspective when things seem overwhelming ---seeing beyond political rhetoric and commercial manipulation ---learn to be at peace with yourself ---How to prioritize your needs so that effort is spent on the most important ---listening to advice from an older person (who may know what is really important) ---How to raise children in a constantly changing society ---going beyond tolerance to seeing the dignity of each individual ---learning to focus on all that is good and let go of what drags you down ---How to live in the now with awareness and without judgment ---How to gradually reduce your ego and get out of yourself ---realizing that love is a verb… Someone once said that life is not a dress rehearsal. Take time to go in peace… ********************************************************** Happy Easter to all Christians out there. Easter and Holy Week are the basis of our religious and life beliefs. But because of my own difficulty in living the life of a Christian I wonder, sometimes, if we really know what we should be doing in order to genuinely call ourselves Christians. So, here are some things that I believe illustrate what are important if we want to actually claim the title: It seems to me that you'll know you're a Christian when--- ---You see everyone as your neighbor. ---You take your faith to work (and wherever you are) ---"Oh my God" is more than an exclamation of surprise. ---Prayer becomes a daily conversation with God. ---The light shinning in the darkness is you reflecting God's love. ---Lifting up others becomes a daily exercise. ---Your preaching is "wordless" ---"Come follow me" takes you in a different direction than the crowd. ---Compassion is actively lived. ---Your car knows the way to Church as much as to Walmart. ---Choosing forgiveness is more important than being righteous. ---Learning to love is your main goal in life. ---Jesus Christ is by far the biggest hero you know. ---Someone' s need is more important than your want. ---You accept people where they are. ---You take loving action toward anyone in need. ---etc. Now the hard part is being consistent (ie. faithful)... ****************************** 4/12/19 Jumping Over Quicksand Seldom do we know when life is about to throw us yet another challenge. It creeps up and strikes so quickly that we only have time for the usual defensive rote reaction to a stressful situation. This is the reaction that slams the door on any pretense of gaining understanding or perspective on the situation. One of the most difficult things in the world is to be at peace with oneself on a daily basis, and especially when we find ourselves in one of these situations. To do this takes a lot of letting go and ego eliminating, like letting go of control and getting rid of self-absorption. It’s amazing to realize the extent to which our egos have power over our lives. Much of our time is spent in fear because of it. The ego seems to keep us in a constant state of defensiveness, i.e., protection of our self-esteem, the need for control, trying to justify our very existence. If only we could instantly know and believe how unique and worthwhile we are. To know what it means to be a child of the God who gives unconditional love. To understand that rules, regulations, and threats mostly come from other human beings who likely are playing the control/power game. But no matter what condition we find ourselves in, God’s call is always to learn to love... ++++++++++++++++++++++++ 3/19 It’s snowing again, a gentle but steady snow. It’s the kind that makes you want to go into hibernation and slow down the pace of life. It seems that this would be a good time for mindfulness and meditation. When I say this it probably sounds like more work to some of you. I wonder how many approach anything new to them as an obstacle to be overcome. But mindfulness and/or meditation are designed to take away stress and to create personal peace.. Some people are afraid to let go and to just be. Some feel that if they stop accumulating pockets of stressful activities, they may realize how pointless these are. Other individuals are afraid to be alone even for a few minutes. And some seem to be misguided by our social network and have priorities mixed up. Whatever the reason, it probably is worth it to try—in a simple way. Aim to give yourself only five minutes each day to just sit in a state of calm and peace. Give no thought to problems, events, relationships, meetings or appointments. Don’t plan dinner or the weekend... Get the point? If doing this occurs on a regular basis it is very possible that you will become closer to the really important things in life and living has more meaning. It may even bring you closer to God… | |
In the Moment...
 |  2/10/19 Hello again... I'm one of those people who rarely get frustrated and feel irritable about something negative in my life such as breaking something or making a mess and having to clean it up. I usually just go ahead and fix the situation. But today, when I came on line to copy a blog that I had just written yesterday, I found it gone, floating somewhere in space, and I was left frustrated by what happened. But being the practical human that I am, I finally realized that what must have happened is that I forgot to post it. Arrrgh!!!... So, what am I supposed to learn from this? Well, I guess my words are not as important as they might seem, and the world will certainly continue on without them. Maybe losing something is a way of taking the ego down a notch by pointing out what is not really important. So life goes on one moment at a time and living in the moment gives a chance to decide how to respond to frustrating situations, such as loss of our work. Every minute we have a choice... |
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